
Criticism always hurts. There is no such thing called positive or negative criticism. When it comes it comes with an arrow to pierce right through. No matter how calm or composed you are its gona prick you at some moment. Who likes brick bats anyway? Everyone likes to be praised and appreciated and talked about in good words.
Now take me for example..
I've been this guy who's never had a fight with anyone. Not even with my closest buddies. Its just in my nature to keep people happy. Take them the way they are. I dont like to crib about people everyone has their own nature. I am being called diplomatic or manipulative for that but it doesnt change me. I am a people's person and I like it. I like it when i have a thousand people to greet and shake hands with when I enter my college.
But then all of a sudden I had this really interesting conversation which ended up as an argument with one of my oldest and closest friends and got to know so many flaws about me which i thought i never had.
This is the thing about friends.. "A good friend will tell you whats the matter with you in a minute. He may not seem to be such a good friend after telling."
another thing about friends " Never explain - your friends dont need it and your enemies wont believe you anyway"
Thats the problem with criticism. Till the time he/she tells you the sugar coated words he's ur best friend but one bad thing about you and he's no more your best friend.
So criticism is often very difficult to take in your stride.
Specially for someone who's never had it before and specially from someone who's never ever told anything against you.
It hurts. It makes you think. It disturbs you like crazy. But again my favorite quote comes handy in stress situations "Whatever happens, happens for a reason"
So may be this might strengthen the bond or it might make me look at myself and think where am i going wrong but it was a good change. You need to hear something like that to do some introspection but not very often.
So criticize all you want but make sure you dont hurt the person. Tell him whats wrong but give him a reason why is it wrong. Tell him the bad points but also tell him why he is good enough to have a discussion. After all you are harsh and you are sensitive both with people you care the most. So its never too late to criticize and its never too late to change for GOOD.
5 comments:
comments pe verification kyon daal diya hai who nikal its irrritatin ,,,
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is this bout vikram ....??n the argument u guys had on my status /...??
nice blog.
true... but sometimes being harsh is necessary...
http://theparanormalguy.blogspot.com/
There is no simple way to let your friends know of their mistakes. Criticism makes you look as a bad person, but if you are close enuf, i guess its ok(if other person has that level of undestanding)
Hi Malpani...
This is such an honest post...
And one to which anyone can relate...
I found myself in all that you mentioned...
Being a people’s person is the only way to be for me...
I remember here, in class 12th we had a kind of game...
Everyone had to write their name on a sheet of paper and it was circulated around the class for others to anonymously write their opinions about each one!
I had 45 out of 46 positive n absolutely flattering responses...
One said however that I was cheeky n arrogant and thought too high of myself!
That one comment bogged me down despite the 45 others that should have elevated me...
Such is life...such is how we are!
We bask in praise and wither in criticism...
We appreciate it in small tiny doses, but if you fail to sugar coat it, we choke on them too!
Brilliant read!
P.S. I strongly believe it too, that everything which happens...happens for our good!:-)
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